Jan 21, 2010

进退两难

twocold

之前一直没有订阅韩寒的blog,因为觉得他的人生道路并不“主流”。
慢慢地才明白,其实是我们被“主流”了,自然也就明白这样的人 才是 人才,才是我们这个社会所稀缺的。

他一直喜欢调侃各种囧人,从小四到70码,没有敌手。不过这次他选择了咱中国最彪悍最神秘的群体--“有关部门”。我想这和他之前的杂志被禁止出版有一定的关系--既然平面媒体无法面世,那就选择在网上调侃“有关部门”。诚然,若是公平竞争的话,“有关部门”是必输无疑的。一方有数十万的订阅者和数百万乃至千万的潜在读者;而另一方则如同地下组织,这场对决没有悬念。只可惜这场对决中“有关部门”既是对手又是裁判;打不过了,it就禁止韩寒出场。所以这场好戏还有看头。

韩寒最近的表现对“有关部门”来说是个难题。万一把韩寒逼急了,他到墙外开个博客,这样一定会大大推动某项技能的普及化,而且这对耗资巨大的神盾来说也是件很可悲的事情。
可不禁止他出场,他会不断的发表“育儿经”,这轰动效应恐怕也不小。

所以 还是让《独唱团》面世吧。

--附韩寒被删文章的blog,需跨长城--

http://twocold-hanhan.blogspot.com

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Post by SUN @ 2:24 pm | 随笔杂谈 | Comment (0)
Jan 19, 2010

I am just speculating

这是韩寒文章的英文版:
From http://is.gd/6z3E8

中文版见这儿:http://goo.gl/fb/dOF6

德文版见这儿:http://is.gd/6z3mG

"I am just speculating"

[This blog post by China's top blogger was deleted by the blog hosting service Sina.com.]

(Bullock.cn) I am just speculating. By Han Han. January 17, 2010.

2010: China begins an Internet clean-up campaign with the slogan: "If you stop beating someone for 3 days, he/she may get on the roof and remove tiles." (Note: 三天不打,上房揭瓦 is a Chinese saying. When applied to children, the notion is that you beat your child in order to make him/her behave (as in respecting authority, maintaining discipline and being a good citizen) and, conversely, if you don't beat your child, he/she will misbehave. It also applies to wife-beating.)

2010: The relevant department expands the list of banned terms. The Chinese word for "file" (which has the same sound as Party) and the English letter "D" disappear in mainland China. Dangdang was changed to Angang, while Douban became Ouban.

2010 June: The government inaugurates the "Protect the Children" campaign. Children's Day is elevated to the same status as National Day. It is also announced that all information that is unfavorable to the healthy development of children and adolescents will be strictly prohibited. At the same time, the Shanghai World Expo introduces the slogan "World Expo, World Expo, catch ten thousand adulterous couples in bed" in order to conduct online and offline anti-pornography (anti-"yellow") campaigns simultaneously. The government makes it clear that anything and everything connected to pornography shall be censored because they stand for obscenity and feudalism. Elementary school students are mobilized to march in the streets to demonstrate against anything pornographic ("yellow").

2010 July: The Elementary School Students Patriotic Committee finds out that the five yellow-colored five-pointed stars on the national flag are inconsistent with contemporary progressive ideas. The relevant department decides to change the five-pointed stars from yellow to red.

2010 August: The government discovers that the red five-pointed stars are the same color as the background, so that it is hard to find them. Representatives of elementary school students propose the five-pointed stars be changed into green color, to represent green scarves and Green Dam.

2010: Based upon the recommendations of the Elementary School Students Loving Care Committee and representatives of elementary school students, the government tightens the censorship standards on photographs, with guiding principles such as "erect nipples equal bare nipples."

2010: All Internet forum masters are formally given public service worker status.

2010: The government introduces a brand new Internet Great Wall. This Great Wall system is based upon the collective wisdom of innumerable of experts from all walks of life in China. They work together at a military base. The satellite photos of their work site was misinterpreted by people inside and outside of China as those of an aircraft carrier under construction.

2011 January: The government allocates 100 billion yuan to hire Internet commentators from its next round of economic stimulation package. The pay for Internet commentators rises from 50 cents per post to 1 yuan per post. The target for 2011 is to have 100 billion positive posts. The Fifty-cent Gang members at the various forums weep in gratitude because their long, arduous work over the years has finally allowed them to join the big team. From there on, the ratio of Internet commentators versus normal people is about 50:50 at the large Internet forums.

2011: Google, YouTube, Facebook, Twitter announce that they are re-entering China and opening up registration. At the same time, the aforementioned websites announce from the United States that they are not developing any businesses in China. But their announcements are instantly censored, so that nobody in China knows.

2011: All those who register at the aforementioned websites are systematically tracked down by the Great Wall system. Their computers are re-installed. Afterwards, if the users want to visit a general-purpose website, they can only reach People.com.cn and Xinhua; if they want to visit a forum, they can only go to Strong Nation Forum and Tiexue Forum; if they want to visit a video site, they can only go to CCTV 1. Once the system is re-installed this way, there is no way to undo the settings.

2011: The price of computers goes up by 100%. Computer scalpers proliferate. When users buy new computers, they find that they can only access the aforementioned websites.

(more...)

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Post by SUN @ 12:17 pm | 他山之石 | Comments (3)
Jan 9, 2010

独唱团

独唱团

《独唱团》难产了,用韩寒自己的话来说就是“遥遥无期了”。

据说是领导们发现(我高度怀疑这一点,原因见后)《独唱团》的封面寓意深刻,如图所示。
提示一下,不是扫黄打非的范畴。

有些可惜,不知道他会不会寻求别的途径来发行,毕竟这么牛的封面,不容易啊。




-----附个笑话----

勃列日涅夫:同志们,美国人登上了月球,我们不能再等了,党决定让你们上太阳。

宇航员:总书记同志,我们会被烧死的。

勃列日涅夫:没关系,同志们,党都替你们想好了,你们晚上去。


---Update,2010,01,10---

好吧,我发现这个寓意还是深刻了点---我就交代了吧
这个封面的意思是:

“挡”中央,扛着枪

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Post by SUN @ 5:10 pm | 信手涂鸦 | Comment (0)